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Learn How to Write a Retirement Speech

by Reviewing Famous Hollywood Retirement Toasts


Background Hollywood has provided us with humorous retirement speeches and sincere ones.  We have shown some of the memorable ones below as examples of the proper way to write an effective retirement speech.  We believe that after reading some of them, or watching the movies, everyone should be able to learn how to write a retirement speech that will be memorable for the retiree at his or her retirement party or retirement parties.  These will be free retirement speeches or a free retirement speech.
Humor While reading a sample retirement speech below, remember that each toast has a humorous introduction such as saying 'Warren and I go way back, waaaaaay back to the horse and buggy days' or 'I hope I can fill your shoes . . . because . . they sure seem awfully big.'  It's always important for a speech to break the tension by saying something humorous.  This puts the speaker at ease and makes the listeners more comfortable as well.
Sincerity After everyone has enjoyed a gentle laugh, the toast should include a few sincere, heart-felt words about the retiree's career, family or hobbies.  When done well, there may be a few tears of joy but everyone will cherish the moment, especially the retiree.

The Movie 'About Schmidt'
written by Payne and Jim Taylor.


A speech by
Warren's Best Friend
Hey, Warren, how do you feel about these young punks taking over our jobs. Seems like some kind of conspiracy to me.  Now, I've known Warren here long before most of you have been alive.  Warren and I go way back, waaaaaay back to the horse and buggy days at Woodmen.  That's ancient history.  Anyhow, I know something about retirement.  And what I want to say . . to you Warren, out loud, so that all these young hot shots can hear . . . is that all those gifts over there, don't mean a gosh darn thing.  And this dinner doesn't mean a gosh darn thing.  And the Social Security and pension don't mean a gosh darn thing.  None of these superficialities mean a gosh darn thing.  What means something, what really means something, Warren, is the knowledge that you devoted your life to something meaningful, to being productive and working for a fine company, heck one of the top rated insurance carriers in the nation, to raising a fine family, to building a fine home, to being respected by your community, to having wonderful lasting friendships.  At the end of his career, if a man can look back and say 'I did it, I did my job . . . then he can retire in glory and enjoy riches far beyond the monetary kind.  So all you young people here, take a look at a very rich man.  I love you buddy!
A speech by
Warren's Replacment
Well, uh for my part, I'd just like to say, Warren, that as the new guy taking over for you, I hope that I can fill your shoes . . . because from the looks of the people here and what they think about you, they sure seem awfully big.  As most of you know, I just moved here recently from Des Moines with my wife Patty and Kimberly, our 14 month old.  You all have just made us feel so welcome.  And Warren, I want you to feel just as welcome to drop by the office to visit any time you want.  In fact, as we have been discussing the past few weeks, I might have some questions to ask about our various products . . . like the new universal life policy we're launching next month.  And, uh, well anyway, here's to you Warren.

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